Here you go.. these are coming from someone who has lived in Orlando for years and has extensive experience in the hospitality industry. I have worked in hotels and I have worked at the theme parks. Now I have a real job, but that's beside the point. If these seem harsh they were meant to be. Do you know how many tourist come here and get robbed or worse, Airtours didn't tell you about that did they? I will try to cover most to the scams and traps. If you MUST come here then read these and look at the rest of the website, there are links to the other pages at the bottom..

Someone very wise once told me, "You can't beat a tip from a pro!". I have lived by that mantra.. so here are your

ORLANDO TOURIST TIPS

Don't come here - Seriously, why would you? For Disney? The parks in Tokyo and Paris are MUCH newer and nicer than ours.

Go somewhere else - Orlando DOES NOT represent America.. there are MUCH better places to go.

Don't Ride anything at Disney that his killed more than 2 people in the last week - This includes Mission Space (any normal business would have closed something that killed two people in the first six months of being open, but not Disney), Tower of Terror, and Rock N' Roller Coaster. Feel free to ride Splash Mountain, it has been a couple of years. Oh and be sure to ask a Disney cast member what movie Splash Mountain is based on.. and then ask why it isn't for sale ANYWHERE.

DON'T MESS WITH TIGGER! He has molested one woman and slapped a kid in the face.. think I'm kidding? Here are the news links TIGGER SLAP TIGGER MOLEST

Don't get into fights - I know in your country fights are common place and the police just break them up and everyone shakes hands, picks up their teeth and goes home.. here they do NOT. You will end up in jail with no bond. Vacation ruined, have a nice day.

If you buy travelers checks keep them and use them - They can be used anywhere in Orlando like cash. The reason I say this is because most people try and cash them in as soon as they land in Florida. Why did you buy them, did you think cash wasn't allowed on air planes?? The point of travelers checks is that when you get robbed or the hotel staff steals them from your in room safe (I'm sure one of these two things will happen while your here) you can try and get them replaced... maybe... months from now...

Don't fall for the time share scam - If you go to a time share they are going to TORTURE you until you buy one... is that worth ONE Disney ticket that has been used and they bought from some guy on the corner? The time shares REALLY do buy used tickets and then resell them or give them away, which is not only illegal but you probably won't get in the park with it anyway.

Disney DOES NOT sell discount tickets to other companies to resell - So if someone is offering you discount Disney tickets and they ARE NOT DISNEY a little red light should go off in your head to tell you something is fishy.. but if your a tourist in Orlando I doubt you have that little red light. What I'm saying is that all those tiny stands, booths, and counters on I-drive with HUGE signs claiming discount tickets are one of three things.. 1. liars 2. Selling used or fake tickets 3. Trying to sell you something.. sound familiar (Read the last tip!). AAA is the only company selling discounted tickets and they are like 3 cents off.. you heard me right. AAA loses money on the tickets just be the only company who can claim discount Disney tickets. Now Disney itself has a few discounts like military, local resident, and so forth.. since its like $60 now to get in I better get a discount! Then I have to pay $12 to park?? Another $10 for a cheeseburger, are you joking!?!?

Cab drivers are going to rip you off - Well there's a shocker huh? Half the cabs in Orlando are Gypsy cabs.. meaning they are unlicensed and illegal. They are the white Lincoln town cars or white Crown Vics. They don't have a business license.. all they have is a nice car (and probably several sets of plans on how to build bombs.. about 4 out of the 911 hijackers had been cab drivers in Orlando at some point in their life LOOK IT UP). Here is how they work.. they are friends with ALL the bellmen at the hotels. When you ask for a cab to the airport the bellman calls his friend. When he gets there you will witness the "$10 handshake". That's when the cabbie shakes hands with the bellman and gives him $10... out of the $30 he is about to charge you for going to the airport. Mears Transportation is the main LEGAL company now, they have bought out the smaller ones.. but I have heard stories of them going the long way to run up fairs. JUST RENT A CAR! Your spending $1200 on your hotel room, just rent a car! They are cheap at Enterprise and Budget!

Don't walk on I-drive after dark.. what am I saying, don't walk ANYWHERE in Orlando after dark. Always park in a well lit area and go straight from your car in to your hotel.

Don't leave ANYTHING visible in your car.. dirt bags here will break your window for pocket change, so you KNOW your purse or luggage aren't safe.

The local people don't like you! Sorry to break it to you.. the hotels, the restaurants, the theme parks.. they all wish you weren't here. Some just hide it better than others. Why you ask? Because they deal with tourists all day every day and even though you and your family might be nice about 99% of the other people they have interacted with that day WERE NOT. The people at the American Airtours office are REQUIRED to wear clip on ties.. they wore normal ties in the past but several times irate UK travelers grabbed the ties and tried to pull them across the desk. Now they wear a clip on tie or nothing. If someone did that to you how would you treat people from their country in the future? Need proof? Here is a message board for Disney cast members to make fun of what they call "SGs" (stupid guests) - www.stupidguesttricks.com